Mentoring – The Lowedown

Helping out our Cru Military ministry at the FamilyLife Conference in Anaheim

Lately, we’ve been thinking a lot about marriage. In November, Jen and I attended a Weekend to Remember Marriage Conference hosted by FamilyLife. It was excellent. If you haven’t been to one, we highly recommend it.

In February, Jen and I helped out at a Weekend to Remember Conference in Anaheim. There were a number of military couples attending and our Cru Military ministry had a special booth and specific resources to help military families navigate the unique marital struggles they encounter.

In February, our church embarked on a 3 year plan that will lay the foundation for the next 45 years. One of the initiatives that is laid out as part of the “Dream Now” vision is strengthening families. A statistic that was shared is that 70% of all marriages in Orange County end in divorce.

We know all too well how the breakdown of the family has impacted the Young Adults of today. The landscape of families has encountered a seismic shift in the last 40-50 years.

An often quoted statistic about the spiritual influence men have with their family

When I was a kid, I didn’t know anyone whose parents were divorced. Today, divorce is so common that it’s almost strange to meet a Young Adult whose parents are still together.

All of this has created some unique challenges and opportunities when it comes to ministry.

Young Adults are less likely to have a strong extended family to rely on for support, whether it’s emotional or financial.

Because the nuclear family has been so fractured over the past 50 years, many Young Adults are longing for older adults who can provide mentoring and sage life advice that older family members have traditionally provided. I can’t tell you how often a Young Adult has mentioned to me or to Jen that they have nobody in their life who is older with whom they can discuss life issues.

For the last few years, I’ve been very involved in men’s ministry at our church (Jen is also very involved in the women’s ministry). I do some occasional teaching and I give leadership to a group of men who meet early on a weekly basis.

I’ve enjoyed applying all of the ministry training and experience I’ve accrued over the years to help older guys grow in their spiritual lives.

As I’ve connected with men over the years, I’ve realized that spiritually speaking, old guys have the same needs as young guys. Men want to make a difference and they want their lives to count. Men often want to take steps to grow spiritually but many times, they don’t know what to do beyond attending church, giving money and being involved in a small group.

Lately, we’ve been wondering if we can somehow “marry” our day job (Young Adults) with our part-time ministry to older adults.

Young Adults overwhelmingly indicate they want older people in their lives to function as mentors and even spiritual guides.

Older adults often communicate a strong desire to make an impact in others, particularly the younger generation.

Partnering with Cru Military at a Family Life Conference. Multiple ministries collaborating and intersecting.

What if we could help older Christians take steps to mentor and influence the young adults around them?

We’ve actually had this idea for a while but it’s been brought to the forefront more recently as God has provided numerous situations and personal examples that have made this need obvious and undeniable.

Our vision is not just to mentor Young Adults directly, though we are doing that. What we really want to do is to multiply our impact by equipping others, particularly older, wiser and more mature believers to take steps to pour into and impact Young adults. We believe that there is a golden opportunity for those who are entering their golden years!

Perhaps that sounds interesting. If so, let us know. We’d love to hear your thoughts and provide support and help for you to take meaningful steps that would enable you to make an impact in the lives of others!

Thank you for your continued prayers and partnership that enables us to minister to Young Adults…and Old Adults as well!

January marked the 35th anniversary of me (Dave) being on staff with Cru. As I reflect back on the many years of ministry, I’m amazed at all God has done in the lives of the students, staff and Young Adults to whom we’ve ministered. What follows is the story of one student whose life was impacted at San Jose State University and the many ways he and his family continue to make an impact for the Lord today.

It was the fall of 1990 and we were on campus at San Jose State University for Registration Day, a day when students could change their classes, settle their schedules and get their books for the Fall Semester.

Our goal was to surface students who had a spiritual interest and since we really wanted to engage with freshmen, we set up a large banner that said “Freshmen, Stop Here!”

Over the years, the “Freshmen STOP Here” banner was effective in drawing new students to our table.

We offered ice cold Coca-Cola drinks in exchange for filling out a spiritual interest questionnaire.

One of the students who filled out a card was Dexter. I still remember his bright smile and friendly demeanor. I flagged his card to ensure that I wasted no time in getting back in touch with this potentially “hot” lead.

What I didn’t know was that Dexter wasn’t his real name and the phone number was not his home number. Being a Cru Staff “NEWB”, I wasn’t yet wise to all the tricks that students use to feign interest in order to get free stuff.

Not long afterwards, I called “Dexter” to set up an appointment to meet. Dexter had decided to put his work number down instead of his home number. And instead of using his real name, he gave a stage name that he had used as part of a dance group. He knew that if he got a call at work from someone asking for “Dexter”, he would know it was someone from this “Campus Crusade” group (as we were known back in those days) and he could avoid the call if he desired.

I was oblivious to all of this of course. I just called the number, which turned out to be an Office Club. I didn’t know any better so I asked for Dexter. Someone on the other end put me on hold while Dexter was paged.

Dexter was surprised to hear his stage name being paged. He thought the call would never go through because there were no “Dexters” who worked there. So why the person chose to page for Dexter in the first place remains a mystery.

Dexter ended up answering the phone and amazingly, he agreed to meet with me.

When we met on campus, I learned that Dexter was a fairly new Christian. I also learned that he wasn’t a freshman. He was a sophomore who recently changed majors, so he was a “freshman” in his major. He stretched the truth on the questionnaire so that he could get a free Coke. We had a good laugh about that.

Maricar and Rauderick (Dexter) are actively planting churches, building disciples and reaching the lost around the world.

Dexter (whose real name is Rauderick) and I hit it off and began meeting regularly for discipleship and ministry training. He ended up becoming a leader in the Cru ministry at SJSU.

A few years later when Jen and I moved to Davis to start the Cru ministry there, Rauderick drove over from the Bay Area and brought us an overhead projector from his job at Office Club that we were able to use for our weekly meetings (yes, those were still the days when we used transparencies for worship music!)

Today, Rauderick is living in the South Bay Area with his wife Maricar and their 4 children, three of whom are in college. He works as a clinic director in San Francisco, providing mental health services and care for those who are most marginalized. But that’s just his day job.

For the past 23 years, Rauderick has been living out his passion for the gospel as a bi-vocational pastor, providing spiritual care and direction to those in his congregation.

Rauderick has a passion for making Jesus known. He and Maricar have been involved in numerous church plants and are active in world missions, training missionaries in the Middle East and pastors in Vietnam.

Raud and Maricar also have a heart for families. They love counseling and mentoring couples using HomeBuilders materials produced by Cru’s FamilyLife ministry.

For the past 35 years, we’ve sought to make disciples of all the nations, raising up leaders and laborers who could make an impact for Christ wherever the Lord might lead.

To me, Rauderick (aka Dexter) is an amazing example of a former disciple who exemplifies our vision: to raise up disciples who will walk with Jesus and become life-time laborers, impacting those around them for His kingdom purposes.

Please pray for Rauderick and Maricar as they lead their family and those under their care. And please continue to pray for us as we seek to raise up others in this younger generation who will become life-time laborers, just like Rauderick and Maricar!