church ministry – The Lowedown

A few months ago, I approached one of the pastors at my church about meeting to discuss a personal matter. We had met many times before over lunch and coffee to talk about men’s ministry, which he helps to oversee, but since this was a personal issue, I suggested we meet at the church office.

When I arrived at the office, he escorted me upstairs and into a conference room, which I had never been in.

I made a remark about how I liked the glass plates on the wall that functioned as dry erase boards and even the conference table had the same glass plates with notes and ideas from a previous meeting scrawled on its surface.

In response, my pastor shared how, just prior to our meeting, he had been in that conference room brainstorming with a Young Adult about men’s discipleship within the Young Adult ministry.

My antenna immediately perked up. Did he say “Young Adult ministry?”

If you’ve followed our ministry with Young Adults for the past 10 years, you probably know about the challenges we’ve experienced in ministering to this audience.

Young Adults are the largest population group in America, and yet, they are the least churched. There are a number of reasons why Young Adults are not active in church, some of which I’ve outlined in previous blog posts. To learn more, check out some of our prior newsletters and blog posts:

Young Adults are leaving the church in droves and most churches simply do not minister well to this demographic.

For the past several years, I’ve talked to a number of pastors at our church, wondering where the Young adults are at and whether Saddleback church has a ministry dedicated to this specific audience.

The response was always the same. The pastor was unaware of any specific Young Adult ministry, but maybe if I talked to “so-and-so”, they might know.

I learned more than I wanted to about the history of Young Adult ministry at Saddleback – how it had once been a thriving ministry but was not currently active.

So when my pastor friend casually mentioned that he had just had a meeting with a Young adult about the Young adult ministry, I was naturally curious.

Before diving into the issue which I wanted to discuss, I asked him some questions about the meeting he had. He knows that I work with Cru and that our ministry focus is Young Adults so I asked him if he would connect me with the young man with whom he had just met.

He agreed to reach out to the person and see if they would be willing to connect with me. He sent a quick text before we moved on to talking about my personal issue.

When our time was ending, he noticed that the Young adult had already texted him back and said that he would definitely be interested in meeting. So I got his contact information and I sent him an email later that afternoon.

A few days later, Logan got back with me and we arranged to meet up for breakfast.

When we met, I asked Logan a few questions to get to know him better. I learned that he grew up really close to me and he had recently graduated from Cal Baptist University.

I was curious where Logan went to high school. It turns out, he went to the same high school as our boys.

I asked him what year he graduated and I learned that he graduated the same year my boys graduated.

I told him I had twin boys who went to his high school and I wondered if he knew them.

That’s when the light bulb went off.

He said, “Wait! Your last name is Lowe? I know your boys. We were in the same Life group together in high school. I didn’t make that connection when you reached out to me.”

Logan is on staff with Saddleback, serving at the Brea campus. But he also helps to lead the fledgling Young Adult ministry that started up last year.

As I shared with Logan our vision for Young Adults and the resources we provide, particularly in helping Young Adults grow and mature in their leadership and their ability to become multiplying disciples, I could see his eyes light up.

I’m constantly amazed at how God works to orchestrate opportunities and open doors. In all the times I initiated with various pastors at our church to inquire about Young Adult ministry, it went nowhere. Then when I initiated to talk about something completely unrelated to Young adult ministry, the door suddenly and unexpectedly opened to connect with a key Young adult leader.

I’m not sure where this might lead but we’re excited about the potential of mentoring and coaching these young leaders who are working to create a community where Young Adults can thrive spiritually and live with purpose.

Our vision is not just to coach and mentor Young Adults, but to coach and mentor others, whether Young Adults or older adults, who can help to lead and mentor Young adults in church communities everywhere.

I was recently invited to attend a quarterly breakfast for the Orange County Chapter of CBMC (Christian Businessman’s Connection).

Marc Ottestad , the coordinator of the group, had connected with me via LinkedIn, thinking that our similar interests and passion for coaching, mentoring and seeing men make an impact for Jesus in their jobs might make for some natural opportunities to collaborate.

When I showed up at the breakfast, I noticed that most of the men were my age or even older. I wasn’t sure what to expect or how this breakfast might directly help me.

At one point, we were asked to shuffle tables to meet some new people and discuss what we heard from the speaker.

I found another table and ended up sitting next to the only guy in the room who was younger than 30.

I introduced myself to Alec and learned that he had recently graduated from Biola and was working at expanding a website business.

When Alec asked what I do, I shared that I help Young Professionals thrive spiritually and live with purpose.

Alec is a recent graduate of Biola University who is seeking biblical community while working to build and expand his website business.

I explained that my wife and I had spent many years ministering to college students but we made a shift in our ministry focus a few years ago because we had seen a void in Christian circles in serving the needs of Young adults, who are often struggling to find the kind of community and support that they need when they are undergoing the biggest changes and most stressful transitions of their life.

Alec’s response was both sad and affirming at the same time. He said, “you pretty much just summed up my current life situation.”

It’s sad that there seems to be so few resources and support for young professionals like Alec. I’ve spent many hours thinking through this issue, trying to determine why this is the case.

My conclusions are not researched…they are just opinions, yet it makes sense to me.

If you think about it, most churches are built around a family model. Nearly every church serves the needs of families – from kids programs to youth events as well as support for parents and marriages.

This is an extremely good thing because, if you haven’t noticed, the traditional family unit, with biblical family values is under attack in our culture. The church may be the last bastion of hope to salvage a biblical understanding of the family unit.

But that same model works against Young Professionals, who are in a season where they have often left their family of origin and are yet to start a family of their own. They are in an in-between season of life – living on their own, learning to live as an adult with real-life responsibilities.

In this in-between phase, which is lasting longer for current 20-Somethings than it has for previous generations, they are looking for others like them with whom they can experience the struggles and transitions of becoming an adult.

Jen and I regularly connect with Young Adults who share their frustrations with attending churches where they struggle to find other Young Adults.

I have heard a number of church leaders tell me that a specific ministry meeting the needs of Young Adults is unnecessary. Citing the benefits of inter-generational worship and community, they contend that Young Adults should simply get involved in the life of the church,.

I believe this view is short-sighted. Research demonstrates that Young Professionals DO want mentors and they DO want to be involved in the life of the church. So in one sense, the idea of inter-generational worship and involvement makes sense. But a weekly men’s group cannot fill the void that’s lacking for many Young Adults – the need for a family-like experience with peers while they are in the season of single-ness.

We don’t have all the answers and we’re still learning best practices as we seek to minister to this audience. But we are seeking to fill the gap in various ways.

After meeting Alec for lunch, I was able to connect him to a Leadership Development group that I recently launched. One of the guys in the group is also a Biola grad with whom Alec was acquainted.

We’re also exploring the benefits of coaching. It may not meet all of Alec’s needs, but our hope is that it will provide a few missing elements that will help Alec, and others like him, to thrive spiritually and live with purpose during this season of life!