Category: Military

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A “Golden” Opportunity

Helping out our Cru Military ministry at the FamilyLife Conference in Anaheim

Lately, we’ve been thinking a lot about marriage. In November, Jen and I attended a Weekend to Remember Marriage Conference hosted by FamilyLife. It was excellent. If you haven’t been to one, we highly recommend it.

In February, Jen and I helped out at a Weekend to Remember Conference in Anaheim. There were a number of military couples attending and our Cru Military ministry had a special booth and specific resources to help military families navigate the unique marital struggles they encounter.

In February, our church embarked on a 3 year plan that will lay the foundation for the next 45 years. One of the initiatives that is laid out as part of the “Dream Now” vision is strengthening families. A statistic that was shared is that 70% of all marriages in Orange County end in divorce.

We know all too well how the breakdown of the family has impacted the Young Adults of today. The landscape of families has encountered a seismic shift in the last 40-50 years.

An often quoted statistic about the spiritual influence men have with their family

When I was a kid, I didn’t know anyone whose parents were divorced. Today, divorce is so common that it’s almost strange to meet a Young Adult whose parents are still together.

All of this has created some unique challenges and opportunities when it comes to ministry.

Young Adults are less likely to have a strong extended family to rely on for support, whether it’s emotional or financial.

Because the nuclear family has been so fractured over the past 50 years, many Young Adults are longing for older adults who can provide mentoring and sage life advice that older family members have traditionally provided. I can’t tell you how often a Young Adult has mentioned to me or to Jen that they have nobody in their life who is older with whom they can discuss life issues.

For the last few years, I’ve been very involved in men’s ministry at our church (Jen is also very involved in the women’s ministry). I do some occasional teaching and I give leadership to a group of men who meet early on a weekly basis.

I’ve enjoyed applying all of the ministry training and experience I’ve accrued over the years to help older guys grow in their spiritual lives.

As I’ve connected with men over the years, I’ve realized that spiritually speaking, old guys have the same needs as young guys. Men want to make a difference and they want their lives to count. Men often want to take steps to grow spiritually but many times, they don’t know what to do beyond attending church, giving money and being involved in a small group.

Lately, we’ve been wondering if we can somehow “marry” our day job (Young Adults) with our part-time ministry to older adults.

Young Adults overwhelmingly indicate they want older people in their lives to function as mentors and even spiritual guides.

Older adults often communicate a strong desire to make an impact in others, particularly the younger generation.

Partnering with Cru Military at a Family Life Conference. Multiple ministries collaborating and intersecting.

What if we could help older Christians take steps to mentor and influence the young adults around them?

We’ve actually had this idea for a while but it’s been brought to the forefront more recently as God has provided numerous situations and personal examples that have made this need obvious and undeniable.

Our vision is not just to mentor Young Adults directly, though we are doing that. What we really want to do is to multiply our impact by equipping others, particularly older, wiser and more mature believers to take steps to pour into and impact Young adults. We believe that there is a golden opportunity for those who are entering their golden years!

Perhaps that sounds interesting. If so, let us know. We’d love to hear your thoughts and provide support and help for you to take meaningful steps that would enable you to make an impact in the lives of others!

Thank you for your continued prayers and partnership that enables us to minister to Young Adults…and Old Adults as well!

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The Last Supper and the Human Condition

Last month, Jen and I took a break from our daily routine and traveled to Italy to visit our son Joshua, who is an Army officer stationed there.

It was a great to visit him and see what his world is like. It was also fun to get a taste (literally) of Italy, though we only saw a small portion of the country.

Jen and I loved hanging out with our son Joshua in Italy, where he is serving as an officer in the U.S. Army.

In addition to spending a day in Venice and a few days in Florence, where we saw Michelangelo’s famous statue of David, Jen and I also took a day trip to Milan, where we experienced a very informative walking tour through parts of the city that included seeing the Duomo di Milano (Milan Cathedral) as well as the famous DaVinci masterpiece “The Last Supper”. 

Venice was exactly how I imagined it from watching movies like “The Italian Job”

I have to admit that the Last Supper was not exactly what I expected. It looked a little different than all the photos you see. It turns out that there’s a reason for that.

Our guide explained that when DaVinci was commissioned to make the painting, he decided against the tried and true traditional Fresco style of painting, which creates a permanent image because the painting is all done in wet plaster.

The downside of this technique is that you have to paint very quickly before the plaster dries. DaVinci wanted to take his time and create a painting with more intricate detail than the fresco technique would allow, so he developed a completely new technique that allowed him to take his time.

Joshua and Jen at dusk in Florence on a bridge overlooking the Arno river

The result was an undisputed masterpiece. However, it became more clear, over time, that DaVinci’s novel new technique was flawed, as parts of the painting literally began to flake away from the wall.

To fix this problem, other painters were often called in to fill in the gaps and “restore” those portions to match copies that demonstrated the original image.

Fast forward hundreds of years and the image on the wall has been painted over dozens of times. The original image is actually lost as many of the finer details, such as facial expressions, don’t look exactly as Leonardo had painted them.

Jen and me pose with the Duomo di Milano (Milan Cathedral) in the background

In 1977, it was decided that the painting would go through a restoration process whereby all the extra layers of paint would be removed so that the image that remained would be only what Leonardo had painted. It was risky because they weren’t sure if ANYTHING would be left when they removed all the layers.

Fortunately, there was still plenty of Leonardo’s original image still intact when all of the extraneous layers were removed. At that point, what was left underwent an extensive 25 year restoration process to ensure that the image would not experience further decay.

What remains is still amazing but it is not exactly the original. There are parts that have faded or flaked away. We have a good idea of what the original looked like based on copies that were created when it was more complete.

The Last Supper by Leonardo DaVinci

I think the Last Supper illustrates the human condition. The Bible tells us that we are God’s masterpiece, but it also says that we’re broken because of sin. 

Just as the Last Supper was in a constant state of decay, so too are we. Without outside intervention, the Last Supper was doomed to decay into, at best, a muted reflection of the original masterpiece and at worst, nothingness!

The same is true with us. Without God’s intervention, we have no hope of reflecting the true masterpiece that God says we are. And even in this life, the best we can hope for is a muted, partial reflection of God’s artistry. 

The Last Supper will never be restored to the original image that Leonardo painted. But we, as believers, have the hope and assurance that one day, we will experience the final restoration of our bodies and our souls. Sin will be eradicated and we will no longer experience death or decay!

THAT is good news and it’s amazing!

Thank you for your partnership with us, which allows us to help others realize that we are all “masterpieces” in need of restoration!

Arrivederci!

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A Recent “Weekend to Remember”

Last month, Jen and I attended a “Weekend to Remember” Getaway Conference sponsored by FamilyLife, which is a ministry of Cru. 

We’ve found this weekend conference to be a great way to reflect on and invest in our marriage. It really is one of the best resources our ministry offers. 

We’ve attended this conference a few times over our 30 years of marriage but it actually had been over 15 years since our last conference, so it seemed like a good time for a refresher. And being in LaJolla was not a bad selling point!

But we had a secondary reason for attending this particular conference. 

Of all the Weekend to Remember Conferences FamilyLife puts on each year, a select few are labeled as “Military Friendly”. What that means is that military couples who attend are given additional opportunities to connect and are provided with additional resources to help navigate the unique challenges that military families experience.

We were able to greet military couples when they arrived, give them a goodie bag and alert them to the lounge and a special breakout session just for them.

Families are extremely important to God. In the Old Testament, God is portrayed as a Father and the Nation of Israel are His people.

The New Testament continues the theme by showing that when people of any race or ethnicity put their faith in Jesus and His death, they are adopted into God’s family as His sons and daughters.

The family unit is an important building block culture. Study after study demonstrates that many of the problems we are experiencing in our culture – the rise in crime, exponential drug use, failing education system, etc. – find their roots in the breakdown of the traditional family. There is no doubt that healthy families result in healthier communities.

Keeping families together is hard enough these days. But military families experience additional challenges that civilian families don’t. From frequent moves to long-term deployments, military families have an added layer of complexity that must be navigated and considered. 

We had tons of FREE resources available for military families to help them navigate the specific pressures that come with military service.

Our goal at this conference was simply to be available to military couples and provide resources that might help them in their current situation.

Over 25 military couples attended the conference. We were able to greet couples when they checked in and then alert them to a special lounge we had prepared for their own use during the conference.

In addition, we had a special breakout session for military couples where we were able to highlight resources and opportunities Cru Military provides for Military families beyond the weekend getaway.

It was nice for us to experience a short getaway given all that we’ve experienced this Fall in our own family. It was also nice to be able to meet some military couples who were in attendance, hear their stories and provide encouragement and resources to help them lead their families well while serving our country. 

If you’ve never attended a Weekend to Remember Getaway, we highly recommend it. Even if you have done one before, it’s never a bad idea to invest in your marriage. 

Reach out to us if you’re interested and we would be glad to give you more information!

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Serving Those Who Serve

Last month was a significant milestone in our family as we saw both of our boys graduate and commission on consecutive days over Memorial Day weekend.

Jacob receives his diploma from Secretary of Defense, Lloyd Austin

It was definitely a crazy itinerary that required lots of intellectual flexibility and some strategic planning. I’m still not sure how we managed to shove all of our luggage plus 4 years of Jacob’s stuff in the back of his car while driving up and down the Northeast corridor.

After all the ceremonies were over, we all managed to make it home, where we were looking forward to about a month together as a family. Quite honestly, this was going to be the longest extended time together since early 2020 when our boys were forced to finish the school year online because of Covid.

Joshua takes his officer oath of commissioning.

A few days after we returned, Joshua started experiencing some stomach pain. At first, we thought it might have been due to something he ate that didn’t sit right but after about 2 days, it got so bad that he could hardly move. I ended up taking him to the ER where we learned that he had appendicitis and needed an emergency appendectomy.

Joshua recovered fairly quickly but was limited early on in what he was able to do physically. We’re grateful that he’s doing better. The circumstances could have been much worse in terms of the timing and location.

The car is loaded up with a loft bed we found locally in the Monterey area.

Last weekend, we all drove to Monterey to drop Jacob off and help him move into his new apartment. Most of the few days we were there were spent scavenging the area for cheap items to furnish an apartment for 3 guys who literally had nothing but the clothes on their back and a few uniforms. Their apartment is not likely to be featured on an HGTV home show but they’re in a decent situation now. It is truly a bachelor pad.

All true bachelor pads must include a free couch picked up from the side of the road. To be fair, this one was a Crate & Barrel model that was pretty clean. SCORE!

Joshua has about a week left at home before he flies to the East Coast where he’ll spend 3 months at Fort Jackson in South Carolina to be trained as a finance officer. After that, he will report to his first duty station in Vicenza, Italy.

It all sounds very exciting and adventurous but we’re learning very quickly that the life of military families is complicated and filled with hardships that non-military families don’t usually experience.

Military personnel are constantly moving and there is a lot expected of them. They don’t have the same freedoms that others do. Even taking a weekend to get away often requires approval from the chain of command.

For the last year, Jen and I have been thinking and praying about how we can help serve those in our military community. We are especially interested in ministering to those who are Young Adults, since that is our primary audience of ministry already.

Last spring, we reached out to some folks in the Military ministry of Cru to see what it might look like to collaborate and serve those who serve.

It turns out that the largest Marine base in the country is just 30 minutes away from us. Of course, I’ve been aware of Camp Pendleton for years as any time we we trek south down the 5 Freeway, we drive right by the base.

But there is not much of the base that is visible from the highway so one might not realize just how expansive it really is.

Camp Pendleton is located between San Clemente (Orange County) and Oceanside (North San Diego County) and serves about 100,000 people (Marines and their families)

A few months ago, I had the opportunity to take a tour of Camp Pendleton with a new friend of mine who does some volunteer ministry with Cru there. I was amazed at how big the base is and how many people are stationed and live there. I was told that Camp Pendleton serves about 100,000 Marines. Many are not unlike our two boys – thrust into a new situation, feeling out of place, knowing nobody while experiencing the weight of expectation that comes with military duty.

We are not changing jobs, but simply looking at ways to serve a community of young people who live near us whose vocation also happens to be “military”.

Please pray for us as we move forward to see how we might minister to Young Adult military personnel in the same way we continue to serve Young adults in the civilian community.

And please pray for our boys, Jacob and Joshua, as they transition to young officers. Pray for them to adjust well and find strong, spiritual connections that can help them navigate the challenges that await them.